for the folically challenged

My Journey to the Washington D.C. DMV

2008-09-02T10:21:00.003-05:00

This morning I went to the DC DMV to finally get my local license. Given that I've been here since the new year, it's probably time.

I went to the “nearest” one. I work at 4th and D, and they have one at 3rd and C (right across the street) from one of the doors to my building. So I get sent to the next nearest one – 95 M street SW.

After waiting in line, I discover that yes I do have the correct paperwork. However, I am at the incorrect location. They only have 1 location that deals with foreign nationals, and that's at 3222 M street NW.

So I trek over to Georgetown in rush hour (so much for getting there early).

I stand in line, and am given my number.

I finally make it to the counter – complete the paperwork, get entered into the DC system, and surrender my VA license (which promptly gets shredded right before my eyes).

No worries though eh?

I get another number, wait in line, pay my fee and get (you guessed it) another number. I then wait in line to get my picture taken.

Once my picture is taken, I receive my new shiny DC license within 3 minutes (this guy is efficient).

Unfortunately, it no longer has “class M” on there.

So I go back to the front, wait in line, explain that I need my motorcycle endorsement as well.

They give me another number, I wait, and go to the counter.

“You have to get a learner's permit,” the troll behind the counter tells me.
“But I have one, I just surrendered it – look – my license is dated today.”
“But it's not in the system,” she/it smugly retorts.
“Right, if it was, we wouldn't be talking – so I need to get my motorcycle permit.”
“You have to take the written, get a learner's permit and then do a road test,”
WTF!

So I go back to the front, get another number, wait in line, take my road test, get a perfect score, get yet another number, wait in line, pay my $20, get yet another number, and go back to the picture guy.

I'm trying to schedule my road test now. It's a 48 minute wait on the phone, but they have an online scheduling system...

Failure

2008-08-19T17:10:00.003-05:00

Today I had a new experience.

I failed a test..

The test was a pre-test for an instructor course I was invited to take so I could be an Vehicle Rescue - Extrication instructor for the Virginia Dept of Fire Programs.

I took the morning off work and I drove out to Leesburg from DC this morning, studied for a couple more hours to make sure I was wired tight. Then I took the test - I need 80% or greater to pass.

64%

When I got home and checked my email - this email came while I was in transit out to Loudoun...

"Chris,

We had to cancel the TTT because of lack of students. I will definitely keep you in mind for future Vehicle TTT.

Mark"

*sigh*

Why I could never work for SAIC

2008-05-19T15:26:00.003-05:00

This was in part of the email:
So today I received an email from a recruiter from SAIC.

Please be advised, that prior to an employment offer:

[snip]

2. You will be asked to sign a Mutual Arbitration Agreement at your new employee orientation the day you start.

[snip]

Would any of the above present a problem for you as a candidate for employment with SAIC?

Wow.

Why on earth would I want to take a job with a company that requires me sacrifice my legal rights for a judge and/or jury trial as a pre-condition to work for them. While I realize that this is highly unlikely, any company that insists on a person surrendering their legals rights for the privilege of working for them can go do some thing that is anatomically impossible.

Stroke it!

2008-04-15T10:46:00.002-05:00

So with spring finally (?) here, I've decided I need to get outside more often and do some fun non-fire department related things.

I'm going to get back into rowing. I used to do this back in college in Cambridge, when I lived in Chicago and when I first moved to the metro area in Alexandria.

The mornings killed me though - having to be at the boathouse at 0445 to unlock the doors (the toils of coaching) sucked big floppy donkey dick.

Happily, there is a boathouse only 3 miles away. They also have an evening programme that will work with my random fire/rescue schedule.

Finally, an excuse to wear lycra shorts in public again!

The fire gods mock me

2008-04-15T01:12:00.001-05:00

Why do they mock me?

Well, a few months ago I was transferred to another crew because they were desperate for drivers. This is obvious simply because I was selected to go.

A bit of background. I do enjoy driving fire engines. It's fun, and even bullshit calls are good because I get to make loud siren noises (with the siren) and blow the airhorn.

Unfortunately, I want to spend more time in the back of the engine doing the actual firefighting.

It would seem that the station's apparatus feel the same way.

I've had a bad run of luck. Since I started driving:

- hit the bay door by driving through it when it wasn't up all the way with Wagon 11. This is DESPITE the red/green go/don't go lights beside the door.
- had a broken valve stem on a tire on Engine 11. Fire trucks with flat tires = bad.
- transmission failure on Wagon 18.

My next shift?

I'm back in the back.

Drive through slurpees

2008-04-12T23:21:00.000-05:00

It's 230am on a Thursday night.

A car drives into the front window of the local 7/11. Shatters the glass, fragments spill into the store.

No one gets hurt.

Moments later, 3 fire apparatus, 1 ambulance, 1 command vehicle and about 5 or 6 police cars are all there, lights flashing away like a bad acid trip or a 1990's English rave.

Get this.

People *still* tried to go into the store to buy their smokes.

*boggle*

Baldgit's Tip of the Day

2008-02-22T10:29:00.006-05:00

UPDATED: I know have pics. Courtesy Jonathan Hickman. Copyright 2008, all rights reserved, Used with permission sorta.

Anyway, the tip of the day:

Don't heat cans of spraypaint on your stove in the kitchen. Otherwise the following shall occur:

1) they explode
2) a brief flash fire will occur
3) the back walls of your house will move off the foundation almost 2 feet.
4) charred paint will cover a lot of your kitchen
5) a whole lot of fire trucks will arrive
6) your neighbours will learn what a retard you are

I ran this call on my first night on my new crew. it was very interesting - we initially though this was a meth lab gone bad, but nope - just a classic case of

"hold my beer, watch this."

At least they didn't put them in the microwave.

Acrimony

2008-02-13T20:03:00.001-05:00

Given the myriad of highly annoying events in my world the last few months, I'm taking a step back and taking a bit of a breather.

This means, if you don't hear from me for the next little while - it's nothing personal.

Unless, of course, you're the source of some of my angst. In which case, it's very personal. :)

The Curse of Chris

2008-02-11T17:02:00.001-05:00

So I've decided I am cursed.

If I:

1) buy stocks in your company - you will almost certainly be delisted. Consider my recent loving with Vonage.

2) Come work on your project - the project will likely be canceled - despite the written funding guarantee for the next several years.

Today I went for my weekly pointless cabal of fools meeting at the company I'm working with. We found out this morning that the guy we all work for at the gov't was canned. Not promoted, not moved. Canned.

Which means that I am likely to be for the chop myself sometime soon. Us evil sub-contractors are usually the first to go when companies circle the wagon.

Thankfully I have another offer out there, we're just waiting on the Gov't paperwork.

Ugh.

The world so far

2008-01-28T16:26:00.000-05:00

Well I'm happy to announce I'm finally unpacked. Though looking around my place feels like it's from a West Elm catalogue. So I guess I still need to personalize it a little more.

The last round of fire classes finished a few weeks ago, and the students had their graduation a few night ago. That was fun, and I'm proud of the students. Despite our best efforts, they passed and become quite proficient with basic firefighting skills. I'm also happy to say that I did really well with my student evaluations. I'm glad my efforts were both effective and appreciated.

I took January off from the fire station to get my world unpacked and organized. This Saturday I'll be back on Engine 18 for 24 hours. Will be fun as always.

I'm also trying unsuccessfully to not get promoted at my station. The Chiefs seem determined to get me moving up the ladder regardless of my own personal wishes. "For the good of the whole company."

Hell, if that's the case I should only be allowed on the Canteen unit.

Furious book clubs

2008-01-18T11:04:00.000-05:00

Now that I'm back in civilization, I have been able to pursue some venues to quench my thirst for intelligent discourse, quick wit and repartee. What's this you ask? Why don't I get this at work or at the fire department?

Well, I largely work from home. Should I be found debating with myself, it's a small step to joing the crazy people outside on the street between my building and the Chinatown arch.

As far as the fire department goes, while there are undoubtedly brilliant people (they are an exception), any attempts at witty banter usually end with the vanquished promising to "kick some Canadian ass". Not really the crowd I'm looking for.

So I found myself at a bookclub the other day. Much to my surprised, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. The book was Fury - by Salman Rushdie. Unfortunately I didn't have time to read the book (I joined only a day or two prior to the meeting), but I went anyway.

The group was a rather eclectic gathering of DCites. There were some govvies, computer nerds, aspiring writers and even some military folks. A fairly accurate cross-section of DC in fact.

The discussion was surprising non-pretentious, thought provoking and meaningful. They talked about the book for a hour or so, then some us went to imbibe some barley based beverages. This too was also good.

I learned a couple things the other night.

1) my opinion of Rushdie's random writing style is also held by others
2) it's possible to have literary discourse without pomp and pretension
3) I'm glad I moved to DC.

Next month's book: The Sparrow, by Mary Doria Russell.

I'm looking forward to it.

New Year, New Beginnings

2008-01-10T04:51:00.000-05:00

2 weeks ago, I left suburban hell and moved into the heart of DC. Right smack in the middle of Chinatown.

So far I'm loving it. I'm on the top floor of a fairly new condo building, with an awesome view of the capitol building and the washington monument.

The move, however, was a complete nightmare. Movers canceling, people not showing up, damaged goods from movers etc. If it could go wrong, it did. I also had to move some of my favourite toys (pool table and such) into storage. My poor motorcycle is parked at the firehouse until I sort out where to park it here. Ugh.

As you can see, there were many boxes. It's hard to go from around 6k square footage to just over 1k.

Nonethess, badass view. The roof has a nice pool, built in gas grills and such. 4th of July fireworks at my place baby!

So this year I'll actually try to post. I didn't post a whole lot last year - it was such a crappy year overall I couldn't be bothered. I did spend some time posting to my spoof response to one of my fire student's blog. He has an excellent writing style (though I'll never again admit it publicly) and talks about things other than the usual dull fire / rescue nonsense.

With that, I wish you a happy new year and let's see what happens in 2008.

Coming up for air soon

2007-08-14T09:05:00.000-05:00

There are many many things going on in my world at the moment. Some good, some excrementous. Among the good - I switched stations. Now I run at Sterling Fire where I'm having a great time with some good friends. We've put out fires, saved some lives, lost some and been generally busy. MUCH better than the other place I was at. The organization is super professional as well.

Meanwhile, I've landed a very short term contract (a few weeks) wherein I have to do a detailed technical architecture for all of Health and Human Services (includes NIH, CDC and many other gov't orgs) for their Identity Management solution. It's an interesting problem because a) the prime on the contract provided an architecture with no information, b) each of the organizations within HHS do their own thing, and c) the rough draft is due friday and the final submission is next week. I've been working every day solid. Last night, for example, I went to bed this morning around 6am. Got enough sleep to be vaguely coherent for my 830 conference call where I got to explain my midnight ramblings.

fun stuff. more of the same today.

more on life later.

bald in the news

2007-07-12T09:50:00.000-05:00

well there is much to report in my world, and i'll update this once i'm done all my homework which is due on sunday.

but here's a clip of me in the news fighting a big outside fire. the best part of the fires was putting out fires in my former first due. that was tasty.

apparently the fire marshall who is investigating this fire wants everyone there to fill out an 'exposure form' - though details as to what precisely i was exposed to is not forthcoming.

i do suspect that it was not a pair of random scantily clad lindsey lohan clones.

I'm back.

2007-05-30T11:28:00.000-05:00

and I wish i wasn't. Hate to say it - but I love and miss the UK terribly. I want to move back.

had a fun trips - lots of neat pics. I'll post an update with pics later in the next day or two.

Farewell cruel world!

2007-05-24T07:29:00.000-05:00

So it's time to go to London.

(not my home town, but the original one)

Back next week.

I can just taste the real ale and fish n chips now!

*drool*

Allergies

2007-05-10T13:06:00.000-05:00

In addition to being one of the most accident prone people in the history of man, I also have allergies.

This season my head, sinuses and ears are all swollen and feeling like i've been beaten by a deificus phallus suppolitor sanctifico (sacred rubber dildo of the gods).

I was supposed to have my ER (emergency room) rotation today for my EMT class. My last one was fun (but pretty uneventful). Instead, i'm home with a headache and my nose is running more than a lone altar boy at a remote monastery.

Today life sucks.

I hate tree sperm.

Teeth update

2007-05-08T10:34:00.000-05:00

so last night i go the dentist - time to finally get my veneer installed and stop looking like an organic can opener.

i arrive, sit in the chair, the dentist gets the tooth...

'oh dear,' he says.

'?,' i inquire.

'the tooth is the wrong colour. we'll have to reorder it.'

so in 3 more weeks this saga will hopefully be over. meanwhile, the dentist at least gave me 'something' to fill in the area where i only have a small portion of my top front tooth. it's similar to a piece of chewing gum that is wedged in place, but is enamel hard. not as obvious.

maybe now my friends will stop making banjo noises when i walk in the room.

Drama at the station....

2007-05-08T10:12:00.000-05:00

So on Sunday, April 29 - duty crew started out to be ideal. good weather, good briefing at the beginning of the shift, as some fun yet tiring training. we all returned to the station (after training) tired, hungry yet quite happy.

that's when the excrement collided with the rotary oscillator.

i can't (won't) do into all the details - as there is still a possibility i might press criminal charges, and the internal investigation is underway. meanwhile, i've taken leave until the end of the investigation and/or my emt class finishes - whichever is the latter.

meanwhile - my redhats - who knows who is training them and working with them. i hate that they are the collateral damage.

in the last week or so - i've learned some things:

1) you can write a complaint against someone, yet because you choose (at the time) not to press criminal charges- the 'defendant' (if you will) is still active operationally.
2) we have no by-laws / SOPs for situations like this - this is bad.
3) i've been assured that an investigation will happen, but i might not be told of the conclusions / actions taken (if indeed any are taken).
4) when you write a complaint against someone, you're lucky that you're not under discinplinary action yourself
5) i'm privileged to work with the redhat program, even though (on my own initiave, without any formal direction from anyone) i started it, manage it, run it, and once it was operational - it was 'officially' blessed like it was someone else's brainchild.
6) i had to threaten to quit in order to get time off.
7) i have no news as to what is happening regarding the investigation - again - if indeed something is happening
8) the feeling of sheer betrayal by an organization i have devoted so much time / energy to is very profound and is affecting me in unexpected ways.
9) if the station doesn't go public with a strong statement along the lines of "the actions/behaviours of ________ are not tolerated and have done ______ to ensure that such things do not occur in the future.' - they are in fact complicit in the actions. it's kinda like sexual harassment - if something happens in your organization, and you do nothing - you're open to a whole world of legal shit.

so after learning these things - these are my options...

1) continue to try to be the adult and have some faith that the station will do 'the right thing' (whatever that ends of being). Downside of this is it requires time and a lot of faith in our leadership that right now i do not have.

2) press criminal charges. shitty for the person who would be on the receiving end, but then they did the things they did, not me. also shitty as both the county and the press will hear of this and it would be very ugly. plus i don't want to be the guy who grasses on people. the theory is in the fire service we take care of shit internally. of course, this implies that we will actually take care of shit.

3) do nothing. this means that the behaviours/actions of ___________ will continue to go unchecked, and someone else will be the victim. and i do very strongly believe that this behaviour will continue - there is a long history of it.

4) leave the fire service. while this would give me ample free time, i would get bored and frankly i love it far too much.

5) go to another station. i'm seriously considering this one. given my confidence/trust for my station leadership is at a (justifiable) all time low, it might be the best option. i like to think i'll be man enough to wait for option 1 to play itself out prior to making any decisions.

6) civil action. this depends on the outcome of option 1, but sometimes you need the threat of lawyers to get organizations to change. heck - look at corporate america.

i swear, there is more drama in the fire service than with a group of jr high 90210 girls.

Done!

2007-04-28T10:08:00.000-05:00

So despite having to start our group project from scratch and redoing it in 10 days, and the 3rd (yet highly useless) guy in the group dropping out just under 28 hours before the final presentation - fire instructor ii is finished.

the exam has to be the worst written exam in the history of my history. the exam focused on two areas that were not covered in the class - in fact, one was budgeting (an instructor iii level topic) and the other was on a chart in the corner of one of the pages. the class marks were from 76-82% (50 question exam). I got my lowest score ever at 76. but, of the 17 ppl who started the journey, i was among the 5 who passed.

ugh.

My left foot.

2007-04-16T21:49:00.000-05:00

All my friends are correct - i am indeed the most accident prone person on this damned planet.

while walking (yes walking) down the stairs from the bunk room at the fire station to the engine bay (still walking, not rushing to a call or anything like that), I managed to twist my left foot clockwise such that my left ankle landed on the ground.

Went to the doctor, filled out yet another "brown form" (workman's comp form), had xrays and apparently i tore some tendons or ligaments (i don't remember which - and it hurts too much to go to my car to get the doctor's report) in my left foot. I'm on light duty until i get released by the specialist (appointment later this week).

So yeah, apparently i can't walk down a flight of stairs without hurting myself.

good thing i wasn't chewing gum.

Injury update

2007-04-13T00:36:00.000-05:00

Alrighty... so my most recent visit to my evil satanic^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^Hevil dentist happened on thursday. Apparently my liver is very effective and kept processing the novocaine while the basta^H^H^H^H^Hdentist was preparing my tooth for the veneer. This was hopefully my penultimate visit. I *really* did not like this visit. in addition to the cutting the bottom half of my tooth off entirely, cutting away some of the gum around it and removing front and back enamel - i could actually feel most of what he was doing. he claimed i couldn't. but apparently my casting aspersions on the sexual preferences of his ancestors and himself, the very real threat of imminent physical danger and the way my body clenched and contracted as he did his stuff - he (the evil bastard dentist) decided to give me more novocaine.

So now i look like someone from west virginia. i almost whistle/lisp when i speak (that whole missing most of a large front tooth thing) and i have to eat / drink things through a straw for a few days.

the veneer is supposed to be in sometime in the next week to two weeks. i can't wait...

saying that, i'd rather lay naked and have an army of big furry spiders crawl over me than go back.

i hate spiders.

Vrooooom!

2007-04-06T15:13:00.000-05:00

So my upload speed sucks... but still... :)

Phew

2007-04-06T11:17:00.000-05:00

Well we passed our presentation. We didn't do too badly - it was over all much better then we or the evaluating captains expected (that whole losing a partner thing).

Now there is the final a week from monday which we're told will be the hardest test so far in our fire careers.

The Rule of Thirds

2007-04-05T09:47:00.000-05:00

As some/many/few of you know, I'm trying to complete my Fire Instructor II class. This particular class has been a bit of a charlie foxtrot (i think i mentioned it in my last post).

Anyway, our final presentation is tonight. Almost done. Yes we're cutting it fine, but the third guy in our group bailed on us yesterday. While his contribution has been rather... sub-standard... his timing is pretty crap.

It's not a great loss - this is someone who still doesn't understand the basic precepts that they were trying to teach us in this class. The class is more about teaching theory than fire science. Things like the 3 learning domains - cognitive, psychomotor and affective...

While it's not a loss - it's still annoying as i had to stay up and get up rather early to make sure that we covered his stuff.

The not-so fun part is he called the lead instructor and blamed my partner and i for his leaving. i think he left out all the bits about his 'working 12 hour days' 'don't have much time to put into this' and the fact that most of the stuff he did was very shoddily cut and paste from other sources.

fortunately almost all of this is documented - and we're bringing it to class tonight to ensure our reputations (and grades) aren't going to be affected.

On a side note - the class is about technical rescue awareness. it might even be interesting. heck - i think it is.

but then i am a dork.

Latest update

2007-04-03T15:15:00.000-05:00

So here's an update in the world of chris:

Injury: still healing. Had another root canal and still have a few more dentist visits. each time i go i think it's the last one, but alas - it isn't.

Humour: after my last dental visit, the dentist put me on some meds that didn't agree with me. so i spent the weekend whimpering while in a fetal ball. Reminded me of a visit to the Death Van oh so many years ago.

Anyway, the guys from Station 19 showed up on my duty night (i was home sick) to train with us. They apparently got of the engine with all sorts of facial protection - hockey masks etc. Shame i missed it. Sort of.

Wankers. :)

Work: work is somewhat busy. discovered the project lead hasn't been forwarding any of my work, results, questions or whatnot to the boss boss. This led to some ass chewing until i produced my email documentation trail. note to everyeone - save all your emails (unless you're a congressmen for a penchant for underage pages).

Fire Stuff: my fire instructor II class is a total charlie foxtrot. the lead instructor has been giving us all conflicting information regarding just what he wants us to do project wise. of course it conflicted not only with himself, but the various captains who were to evaluate us. bleh.

I'm currently taking the next level of EMS classes. Good stuff, but very demanding on my time.

The redhat program seems to be working. amazing.

i'm having fun teaching the fire I class, but with all the other classes (ems, instructor ii, officer ii (coming up), command school and all that) - i'm having a hard time finding time.

Viv: things are going well. we're worried about her cats though cause they had some of that tainted food - and one of them was ill. they went to the vet today and we're waiting for some bloodwork to come back. they either have some minor bacterial stuff going on - or somethign more serious. this is very much a bad thing.

Fun: looking at mountain bikes - need to get outside and do fun things. i have a lot of friends who i never see enough who ride - so this might be a good escape, some good cardio and a good excuse to see some old friends. viv is also interested in biking - but wants to rent one the first few times before committing.

cats: mine are well. Baal is going to get a lion cut this summer. he's just too big and furry. i think he'll enjoy life more with less fur. Anat is her usual happy spastic self.

There's been a lot going on in my world, but nothing that i've really had time to write down, or that i thought might actually be worth documenting.

oh- finished the latest ghost recon for the 360. decent enough game. good graphics - i like the some of the new feature. AI for the team mates still needs some work, and the campaign was far too short. but it was a good play. i hope to play smith and co online sometime. maybe this weekend. looks like i will have the house entirely to myself (as well as that huge list of things to do that i've been ignoring). being an adult sucks sometimes.

Losing Face at a House Fire

2007-02-19T13:06:00.000-05:00

So last night, while driving Rescue Engine 9 - we were dispatched to a house fire in Brambleton. Turned out to just be an oven mitt fire (the lady of the house caught her oven mitt on fire, put it in a drawer, denied anything happened and waited for her husband to see the smoke and call 911 - I think Darwin is pissed at us now).

I digress.

While showing a redhat how to pull the supply line off the engine while another one was taking it forward to a hydrant (engine and truck weren't there - needed to keep room for them), I pulled a little hard, wasn't paying enough attention to what I was doing and ended up with a Storz coupling to the face.

I did manage to finish my driver / pump operator duties on the scene despite valiant attempts by our EMS crew to treat me. They just taped a few 4x4 gauze pads to my face while I made sure we had good water supply and such.

Final tally for the evening:

1 swollen and bruised face
3-4 1 to 2 inch lacerations
1 vertical laceration to my upper lip with 2 stitches (it split)
1/3 of my right top front tooth missing (going to the dentist in a few mins to fix that)

the worst injury was to my pride.

but the good news is i might have scar a la Joaquin Phoenix in Ladder 49

Of course, my girlfriend is still much hotter.

UPDATE: 5:05PM
I just returned from the Dentist. Seems several of my teeth have fractures below the gumline. fortunately they should heal. if not - root canal time.

In fact, I just had a root canal. Funfunfun. Good news is, i might need up to 9 more.

This is me lying down in the hospital.

and this is me at the oven mitt fire just before i went to the hospital. notice the dazed look (yes, a different than normal dazed look).

New Years

2007-01-23T18:52:00.000-05:00

It's been awhile since I've posted anything, so i'm going to just say hello. The pictures from the New Year's Eve Gala Vivien and I went to arrived today. So I just wanted to post it cause it (well she) looks pretty damned fine.

While I didn't do a new year's resolution list like my friend Andy, I do have a few things I'd like to do this year:

1) Take Viv to Scotland
2) Spend more time with Viv and less time doing fire stuff
3) Redo my Mum's living room
4) Lose though annoying last couple of inches around my middle
5) More weekend getaways
6) Rock climbing
7) get a mountain bike and actually ride it

so that's my world. it will be interesting to see how it all pans out.

Redhats

2006-12-13T16:56:00.000-05:00

So the good news is I have about 8 redhats at my station that should be going to fire school in the new year. Problem is only about 1/2 of them are viable in terms of being an actual useful, proficient and effective firefighter.

This sucks.

I have one redhat (I directly mentor 2), who knows where *everything* on our rescue engine is. In fact, I'll put his knowledge up against anyone in the fire station, with the possible exception of the Chief (who specced the apparatus).

My other redhat, who is brand new, is hungry for knowledge and training. She wants to be another (redhat #1).

On the other end of the extreme, we have a guy who only talks about another station he went to, is dramatically out of shape (unless that shape is round), and doesn't have the highest level of motivation.

Fortunately, I'll be one of their instructors when they go to fire school in january. This means I'll have an accurate assessment of how they are doing. The last redhat we sent to fireschool failed everything, and when asked how he was doing - he said he had no problems. Happily he moved to Tx. Let the Bush Clan deal with him.

The key obstacle I need to overcome is the culture within the firehouse. Most of the crews don't do *any* training while in house. Ask more than 1/2 of our members when they last pulled a hoseline or threw a ladder they would have to stop and think about it. While the decision of minimum staffing vs quality staffing is for chiefs, for us guys on the ground trying to motivate our brand new members, it is a real pain in my arse.

Shame I can't use a cattle prod. Would make my life simpler.

I worry that our more motivated members will go join stations with more calls and a better training culture.

Heck, I worry that I'll go too.

Election fever, results and a sigh of relief

2006-12-13T16:55:00.000-05:00

So my fire department annual elections have come and gone. Thankfully the result was overall pretty good.

While I think that electing the company level officers (Lieutenant and Captain) is really really really really really really really dumb, I don't see many other recourses in a volunteer organization. Just because people like you, or don't like you - doesn't mean you are the best qualified person to ensure that everyone goes home at the end of the shift.

After all, that's the primary job of the company officer.

The paid guys in LCFR have a good solid testing process. If you know your stuff, you pass and go on the lieutenant/captain's list. If you don't - you don't.

I was nominated for LT, but thankfully didn't win. I really didn't want the job, but I wanted someone else to become LT even less, so I accepted the nomination. Happily neither of us are the LT.

This means I can relax, and continue learning/training and gaining experience that one day, if i end up in that front right seat, will be very helpful.

Let the madness begin

2006-11-16T14:51:00.000-05:00

'Nuff said.

We're not in kansas anymore

2006-11-16T12:59:00.000-05:00

Looks like Mother nature is pissed. Been nice knowing you all.

Baldgit's Tip of the Day

2006-11-16T11:39:00.000-05:00

Never hire your colour blind firefighter friend to repaint rooms for you because you dont' have time to do them.

Pics will be posted once I stop cringing.

Versatility

2006-11-06T12:14:00.000-05:00

While in class a couple of weeks ago, I was asked to introduce myself and say something about me. I couldn't really thinkg of anything witty or interesting. So I decided to ask the Great God Google who I am.

Hmm. Apparently I'm more versatile than I thought.

I am the drummer for Kim Mitchell. At the 2006 CCMA awards I was awarded Canadian Country Music Drummer of the Year. I have also contributed to many computer games (even Donkey Kong 64!). Really cheesy artwork is something I do in my spare time. I also do voiceovers. I love canadian football so much I was selected 28th overall in CFL draft by the Hamilton Tigercats. My brain is so big that I'm a reknown cryptographer who has presented papers and helped write books on Security Engineering, financial and applied cryptography, promotional marketing and how to get out of speeding tickets. Need help building your home? I'm also a featured masonary student. There is also a play, and a Washington Post article about my childhood in Western Kentuky.

What's really scary is some of this is actually true.

Fun times ahead

2006-11-03T10:22:00.000-05:00

I'm trying not to be lazy and actually post stuff. This will help me be more lazy in actuality. By posting the minute details of what is going on in my world, I won't need to talk with my family and assorted friends as much. Moreover, they won't have to talk with me as much either. A win/win if ever I heard of one.

So a couple of weeks ago I was an 'igniter' for the recruit class at the Loudoun training academy. It was much fun, and kicked my butt. Lighting 11 fires back to back, hauling the hay and pallets and just sitting there baking in the rooms while flames roll over my head, while damned fun, it very tiring.

The recruit class is headed to Prince William county's burn building next week. I won't be igniting for them this time, I'll be driving one of the pumpers and pumping. Sweet. Given that I'm in the middle of a DPO (driver / pump operator) class, this is great training/experience.

I'm stoked.

Diary of a Cert Whore

2006-11-02T22:21:00.000-05:00

I've been organizing my books and stuff in my home office (it's only taken 3 months)... I realized I have a ton of books from classes. I am a self professed 'cert whore.' We don't run a lot of calls, so I need to get my training where I can (getting people to train at my station is like putting square pegs in round slots (you need to use a hammer)).

Here's a list of my certs from the last few years:

Basic Fire Certifications
Fire Attack - Essentials
Firefighter I - NFPA 1001-02
Firefighter II - NFPA 1001-02
Hazardous Materials Operations NFPA 472-02

Misc Fire Certifications
MAYDAY, Firefighter Down 16 Hour Program
Rural Water Supply 16 Hour Training Program
Liquid Proprane Gas Emergencies 16 Hour Training Program

Emergency Vehicle Operations
Emergency Vehicle Operations – Class 2 (Ambulances)
Emergency Vehicle Operations - CLASS 3 (Class A Pumpers)

National Fire Academy / FEMA
N.F.A. Arson Detection for the First Responder (ADFR)
N.F.A. Strategy and Tactics for Initial Company Operations
N.F.A. Basic Incident Command System for First Responders

National Incident Management System (FEMA)
Incident Command System 100
Incident Command System 200
Incident Command System 700
Incident Command System 800

Heavy Tactical Rescue
Vehicle Rescue Awareness and Operations
Vehicle Rescue Awareness and Operations (second time I've taken it)
Vehicle Rescue Technician - NFPA 1006-03
Confined Space Rescue Awareness and Operations
Trench Rescue Awareness and Operations
Rope Rescue Awareness and Operations - Phase 1
Rope Rescue Awareness and Operations - Phase 2
Rope Rescue Technician - NFPA 1006-03
Swift Water Rescue Technician -NFPA 1006-03 - Unit1
US Park Police Helicopter Rescue Awareness

Fire Instructor
Fire Instructor I - NFPA 1041-02
Fire Instructor I - UPGRADE NFPA 1041-02
NFPA 1403 Awareness
Firefighter I and II Train the Trainer

Currently Taking
Driver / Pump Operator - NFPA 1002 (completion at the end of November 2006)

Registered for...
Fire Officer 1 (December 2006)
Aircraft Rescue Firefighting – NFPA 1003-00 (March 2007)

Plan on Taking in 2007... (Assuming they are available)
Fire Instructor II
Fire Instructor III
Fire Officer II
Fire Officer III
various other Train the Trainers (these are needed to teach specific classes)

So if any of you have been wondering why you haven't seen me in the last few years, this should explain it.

Maternal Unit Update

2006-11-01T21:11:00.000-05:00

As in all things, there is good news and bad news.

The good news is my Mother seems to be going well. The CT scans show only minute calcium in her pancreas. The docs aren't sure what caused this attack, but they say she seems okay. So she was released this morning

The bad news is she will be staying at her Mother's (my Grandmother) house.

The silver lining here is that this is great motivation to recover quickly and return to her own home.

sigh

2006-10-26T08:08:00.000-05:00

So my mother is back in hospital again. She has chronic pancreatitis. This generally isn't a good thing.

I read some more about it this morning as I realized I don't know all that much about it. Here are some nice highlights (courtesy the NIH).

Definition: Chronic pancreatitis is ongoing inflammation of the pancreas. The pancreas is an organ located behind the stomach that produces chemicals needed to digest food, as well as the hormones insulin and glucagon.

Treatment: The goal of treatment is to reduce stimulation of the pancreas, prevent indigestion, reduce pain, and treat diabetes (if present). Treatment may involve:

* Eating a low-fat diet
* Getting enough fat-soluble vitamins and calcium in the diet
* Analgesics or surgical nerve block to relieve pain
* Insulin to control blood sugar levels
* Supplemental pancreatic enzymes to correct underproduction

Patients must not drink alcohol.

Surgery may be recommended if a blockage is found. In severe cases, part or all of the pancreas may be removed.

Prognosis: This is a serious disease that may lead to disability and death. The risk of death may be lowered the person continues to avoid alcohol.

Well ain't that just a kick in the nads.

Tip of the Day

2006-10-25T22:18:00.000-05:00

Well tonight I learned a valuable lesson. When you slam shut the rear hatch of your SUV, make sure you're not standing underneath it.

Duh.

Weird friends

2006-10-12T09:51:00.000-05:00

So I was IM'ing a friend of mine that I went through fireschool with...

(8:35:25 AM) becca: i had a dream about you last night
(8:36:23 AM) becca: for some reason i decided i wanted to come by your house in the morning on my way to work to scoop the cat box for you. i came in through the garage and saw you tip-toeing around the kitchen and living room wearing white leggings and a pink tutu.

Hmmmm... I have no idea how to respond to that.

New York New York

2006-10-09T00:24:00.000-05:00

So this weekend I was up in NYC with Vivien for her cousin's wedding. It was much fun (insofar as weddings are 'fun'). It was a union of the New York Italian community with the Coonass community from just outside New Orleans. Very interesting crowd.

The wedding took place in Central Park on Gothic Bridge. It was a perfect day for it. The weather gamble more than paid off.

The best part though was the cruise for the reception. All the guests ended up on a small cruise ship for food + music while we toured the various bridges and of course the Statue of Liberty.

The humourous highlight of the evening was when the bridge (who is younger than her brother) took care of her brother (according to good Cajun traditions) and gave him a blow up doll at the reception. Damned funny stuff.

But when you combine New Orleanians with what look to be extras from The Sopranos and an open bar... anything can happen.

We stayed in Manhattan and I remembered just how much I LOVE city life and hate living in the burbs. Gawd help me - but I want to live in downtown NYC. Shame that it costs more per month for an apt that is only as big as my bedroom.

And of course, here is Viv and I on the boat with the Manhattan skyline.

photos (respectively) by me, viv and an FDNY Deputy Chief that I only know as 'Joe.'

And for the ultra paranoid...

2006-10-05T11:42:00.000-05:00

Now you too can know when your nads are about to glow in the dark. Thanks to our enterprising friends at NukAlert, you can have a keyfob that will shriek loudly so you'll know you're about to have a slow death thanks to radiation poisoning.

If you're worried about annoying the public with that noise, I wouldn't be. They're going to die with you too.

If only that strange almond smell would go away.

House update

2006-10-05T11:27:00.000-05:00

Okay,

so i've been rather busy lately. New contract, recently finishing Fire Instructor Level I and Swift Water Rescue Technician classes and such has kept me busy.

I do have some new pics (taken with my phone) of the pad. it's getting there. Slowly.

Still need dining room and bar furniture. Pool room furniture (4 spectator chairs and 1 pub table + chairs) is on the way sometime this month.

Meanwhile, the house...

This is the living room view from the kitchen.

And this is the kitchen from the living room.

More to come...

Sunday Bloody Sunday

2006-08-16T10:50:00.000-05:00

Okay, This is one of the funniest damned things I've seen in a while.

I guess I don't get out much.

Cube Essentials - Sennheiser RS 140 Wireless headphones

2006-07-24T16:35:00.000-05:00

Typically I'm listening to DI.FM while at work, and I've found the limitations of headphone cords to be annoying. So I spent some time doing some research on what wireless headsets I should get.

At first glance, the Sennheiser looks nerdy, bukly and heavy. It's actually very light and super comfortable. I usually forget I'm wearing them. While advantageous, I do tend to look (more) like a dork when I walk to the print and I am still wearing them.

Which brings me to the range. The manual says 500 feet range. I have been able to wander aimlessly all over my floor and have yet to lose any signal. They also have enough batter power to last for an entire work day. And I mean a Smith work day, not mine.

Recharging is also very cool. Use just set them on the enclosed stand and it has a smart charge built in. No fuss or muss.

On to the important bits - the sound quality. 192k streaming audio and 256k mp3s sound crisp clear and with a nice full bass sound. They are also good at blocking out the hum off the office while still letting you hear your phone and such. They have volume on/off and balance controls on the unit itself for convenience.

How much? A reasonable $110 if you search online, or nearly double from the (not quite) Best Buy shops.

Station 9 Haiku

2006-07-19T07:31:00.000-05:00

So another night passes at my fire station 609. Nothing. Not a wheel was turned.

So to celebrate this so unusual occasion (sarcasm chip on overdrive), I wrote some haiku.

Duty is fulfilled
No calls were run, no wheels turned
Same again next week
*
Again at house 9
Silence, safety - prevailing peace
Firemen wait, hoping…
*
The public is safe
Not because we are so skilled
Nothing happens here
*
My crew and I wait
Waiting to help, maybe save
Still we sit, waiting
*
Sirens, lights flashing
Racing against time, to save
That's for other crews
*
Echo in our dreams
Tires screech, crashing sounds then fire
Then we wake, nothing.

*
Sense a common theme perhaps?

the ulitmate commuter car

2006-06-30T09:32:00.000-05:00

So I've been considering getting a cheaper car to commute with. My original motivation was to get an ugly ass hybriad as they are allowed in the HOV Lanes, in addition to not spending >$100/week on petrol. However, HOV access for hybrids is only going to be allowed for only another year. I love my motorcycle, but city riding is frikken suicidal. I don't think a day passes where I don't have some type of close call. Unfortunately I'm not a(nother) bald wanker that is able to ride his mountain bike to work. (yeah I am jealous).

But I do like the idea of an electric car. Sometime around 1998 or 1999 I got to test drive a GN EV1. It was quiet of course (the motor is only on when you drive), and the acceleration and handling was awesome. Problem is, it only had about a 100 mile range. That totally sucked.

Finally, someone is coming out with a new car that will be tasty. In a CNN article which I read while waiting for someone to get a system back online, I discovered a company called Tesla Motors (not to be confused with the physicist or the big hair band.

The Roadster will be able to drive about 250 miles on a single three-hour charge, drive up to 135 miles per hour and accelerate from zero to 60 in four seconds! Tasty!!

Here's the major downside. It will cost between $85,000 and $120,000. And where would one go to have it worked on? Can't really just drive it up to Radio Shack and have some pimply nerd work on it. Oh well... to quote the prophetess Kim...

"It's good to want things."

new tv thoughts

2006-06-28T13:28:00.000-05:00

The ultra nice flat tv that's pictured below the Texas Longhorn is unfortunately not coming with the new house. this sucks.

Currently, my largest flat panel tv is a 35 inch lcd. I plan on doing a projector in the basement, but meanwhile i need something for living room. i'd like to get something that is 42-50 inches (prefer 50), 1080p, and has 4000+ contrast. Unfortunately i have no idea what that might be.

any thoughts?

Beer Necessities

2006-06-26T09:48:00.000-05:00

This weekend was the 10th Annual Old Dominion Beer Festival, which was held in the metropolis of Ashburn.

While lucky enough to miss the crap weather, I managed to enjoy multiple beers from multiple vendors. Some were good, some were crap.

Hefeweizen seems to be a new trend in the US with most of the breweries presenting some version. Unfortunately I didn't taste a single one that tasted anything like the Hefe's I've had in Germany.

Legend Brewing out of Fredericksburg VA has a Brown Ale that was bold, nutty and full of flavour - with no bitterness in the aftertaste. It became my hands down favourite. So if you get a chance to drink some - I highly recommend it. Look out Newkie Brown.

Bong Manor

2006-06-23T11:19:00.000-05:00

So it's official. August 1st I'll be moving into Bong Manor. This place rocks. hugeass kitchen, awesome deck, prewired for audio everywhere, and all sorts of fun. It is also on the 9th hole of a very nice golf course.

Shame I hate golfing. Maybe I can tan naked on my deck and scare the golfers with my Canadian Windmill(TM).

A slideshow was also done by the real estate people.

Learning the ropes

2006-06-23T11:12:00.000-05:00

Day two: Some arena in Portsmouth, Va.

So a few months back, I officially cured my fear of heights. How? I completed my Ropes Rescue Technician Level III class. Ropes III is the highest level of rope rescue training you can get in Canada and US in the fire service. It was damned fun.

Cheesy notice at my fire station's website is here

Best part of the class was when we built a horizontal and vertal rope system that went off a 150foot platform. We needed the first human load (i.e. victim) to go over the side and ride the system. One of my classmates said...

"Let's send the Canadian, they're expendable."

This is me! (you can tell by my Special Needs helmet).

This is still me.

And this is what caused the (un)expected need to change my undies.

Burn baby burn

2005-12-08T10:15:00.000-05:00

It's been a long time since i posted anything here. that's largely because i haven't had that much going on. just working and going to fire school.

the fire classes are nearly done - final exam is two weeks from tonight. eeek.

now we're in the fun stuff. we're taking all of what we've done and actually crawling around burning buildings and such.

My team: Me,"Lightduty" and Becca

So last night we did some search and rescue in the burn building with live fire. we did it on the house and on the aparment building sides.

Searching the room for 'victims'. Me and Lightduty

It was pretty neat. The fires in some of the rooms were big enough that the flames were rolling over our heads on the ceiling. Not always a good thing. It was done on purpose of course so that a) we could experience it and b) put it out.

This is the fun stuff. it's made the class worthwhile. Of course I'll see more fire in the next two weeks than i likely will at the next two years at my station. (we don't have a lot of burning)..

photos courtesy Firefighter Tim Duckworth - thanks ducky

me so tired

2005-10-27T14:09:00.000-05:00

so last night around 220am we got punched out for a house fire on route 50. it's the abandoned home just west of 28 right near the fairfax / loudoun county lines. we were the second due in engine (19 was first). Cool thing was it was actually in fairfax. oops! ;)

oh - it's hard to tell in this pic, but i'm on the crew on the front (side able) of the house with the hoseline.

wheeee

all i can say is this is some fun stuff.

great email quote

2005-10-20T10:22:00.000-05:00

So apparently i'm on the membership committee at my firestation. I learned this via email today.

this, however, isn't the point to this brief post. there was a statement in the email that cracked me up.

Please note that it is with regret that we inform you that [name withheld], an approved candidate and prospective member suffered a cardiac arrest in our parking lot while attempting to attend a duty crew. He survived but to my knowledge is no longer considering membership with Arcola.

Ungrateful bastard. :P

Dammit Jim!

2005-10-20T09:05:00.000-05:00

So the last few months i've been even more of a social hermit than normal. why? well a) my schedule from class takes up most of my time, and b) i'm terrified of going out doing something (riding 211, snowboarding (yeah i know - no snow... yet)) that dramatically increases my chance of injury.

Sounds silly, but recently i was called the most accident prone person on the planet by Andy.

Well his words were prophetic.

bastard.

Last night - while playing tag with my kitties, i ran up the stairs and heard (well mostly felt) a loud 'popping' sound from my lower left extremity. Basically i somehow tore the hell out of my achillies tendon right below my calf. ouch.

fortuntely, despite the perpetucal muscle cramping and the 'mild discomfort' I don't think it will prevent me from doing all my stuff in fireschool - just make me a little bit slower.

So much for playing it safe - who know playtime with cats had such risks?

You better watch out...

2005-10-18T09:41:00.000-05:00

So last night I learned the value of attending the monthly membership meetings at my firestation. I was in class (which is going well - and keeps me too busy to post stuff here), and subsequently was unable to be at the meeting.

So now I'm going to be Santa Claus at our upcoming xmas parades.

Oh, the vote was unanimous.

Baldgit's Tip of the Day

2005-08-23T15:22:00.000-05:00

Formerly known as Bingbong's Tip of the Day.

Brake rotors have sharp edges

Never use wet fingers to do 'detailing' inside your vehicle's rims lest you almost circumsize your finger.

fire!

2005-08-12T11:37:00.000-05:00

this pic was from firehouse.com. it's from a fire up in canada. It's just really cool looking. great shot.

photo by Sarah McGoldrick

ooOOooOOoo

2005-08-08T12:00:00.000-05:00

I just found my next car.

Now there's a footprint on my ass...

2005-08-08T08:28:00.000-05:00

because my butt was totally kicked yesterday.

As I mentioned earlier, I went to Canada a couple weeks ago for a wedding, and subsequently missed one of my HAZMAT classes.

So yesterday I made up the class at my station courtesy the cunning machinations of our career captain Kevin Stiles.

Bascially we went to the schoolyard next door to their climbers and swing set things. The objective was to start on a picnic table, cross the swingsets over a large gap to some climber things, go up the slide, traverse the kid friendly climber obstacle course to the far end of the structure where there was a 45lb plate that had to be transported to the picnic table.

The minor details were we were in full PPE (personal protective equipment - the banana suit), masks/air packs on, could touch the ground and couldn't talk. We did however have a 14 foot roof ladder. Oh, it was also about 90 outside and sunny.

Well it kicked my ass, I got about 1/2way (up the slides and a little further) before the world went dark and I nearly passed out.

It was very educational. Got to see just how entirely out of shape I am. Capt Stiles went on the retrieve the weight and I helped him get it back after I cooled down and rested a bit. But still - my ass was thouroughly kicked.

Very educational. I think I'll be working out and such in my gear for the next while. Sounds silly, but I need to get more comfortable in it and make it a part of me.

I'm still knackered.

WTF? Microsoft is trying to patent 'emoticons'

2005-07-25T13:45:00.000-05:00

Now this is fking ridiculous. At first I thought Amazon's 1 click patent was insane. Now this takes the cake.

My favourite company on the planet, Microsoft, is trying to patent the emoticon.

Thank god europe has the sense to disallow software patents.

It's a matter of time before someone tries to patent the chair to keyboard interface.

17 years later, he finally married the girl.

2005-07-25T12:53:00.000-05:00

Well it finally happened.

This past Saturday, the (mostly) Reverend Wil Stonehill got married.

What more can I say?

The weekend was awesome!

The drive up to Canada was great – nice and relaxing with perfect weather (I took the back roads and avoided the interstates). I arrived nice and relaxed after only 9 hours of driving.
I got to see some old friends, and generally have a great time.
The Stag party was even fun – despite the groom not being a drinker and an Anglican minister. I won't go into any details in order to protect the guilty and their marriages. :) All I can say in this respect it that it was good to be back in Canada.

Anyway, I'm thrilled that Wil and Susan, years later, are finally together.

Yay!

It's worse than that, he's dead Jim.

2005-07-20T13:05:00.000-05:00

Today, Canadian actor James Doohan aka Scotty, Chief Engineer of the USS Enterprise from the original series of Star Trek died today at 85.

Dammit Jim.

Doohan was born in Vancouver, British Columbia, youngest of four children of William Doohan, a pharmacist, veterinarian and dentist, and his wife Sarah; his family later moved to Sarnia, Ontario where he attended high school at "SCITS", Sarnia Collegiate Institute and Technical School and excelled in math and science.

During World War II, he participated in the invasion of Juno Beach on D-Day as a captain with the Royal Canadian Artillery. At 11:30 that night, he was machine-gunned, taking six hits: one that took off his middle right finger (he managed to hide the missing finger on screen), four in his leg and one in the chest. The chest bullet was stopped by his silver cigarette case. Returning from the war, Doohan started his acting career with a CBC radio show appearance on January 12, 1946. He also enrolled in a drama class in Toronto, later he won a two-year scholarship to New York's famed Neighborhood Playhouse, where fellow students included Leslie Nielsen, Tony Randall and Richard Boone.

[edit]

whoda thunk it...

2005-07-20T08:54:00.000-05:00

so last night Andy and I decided to go for a bit of nostalgia and pop onto our old mud to see who was still around and goof off.

i looked at the message board in my old room and found a message dated tuesday may 5 1998 from andy in response to my looking at getting a bmw motorcycle...

"that motorbike is as hot at my pants.

theyre scary things though - one nudge and youre
pavement peanut butter. I'd go with the convertible
myself. I just think cars are more useful :)

_-//Andy"

Now that's funny on so many levels.

the _ultimate_ ipod accessory for women

2005-07-19T09:41:00.000-05:00

Yes, that's right, someone's created a wearable vibrator that works in harmony with your music player. Strap the silicone butterfly in place, plug it into your favourite music player and get jiggy with the musical beat. It will also work in rhythm with external noises from stereos or club sound systems, so you'll be able to get into the... er... groove and get off on it all at the same time. Ah, the joys of modern living... If that's not an example of technology making life better, we don't know what is. Get yours from the excellently-named Grand Opening for $70.

Almost makes me wish i was a chick.

Paint it black

2005-07-19T09:33:00.000-05:00

i'm a nerd.

no - really i am.

i'm sure this comes as a shock to you.

why (today) am i a nerd?

because i'm all excited about this keyboard I bought from Thinkgeek.com. the action on the keyboard is actually pretty nice - and i do enjoy the liberating feeling of not looking down to type. my typing speed is getting quicker. i love it.

Black is beautiful.

IKEA Phu><0rz!

2005-07-18T13:05:00.000-05:00

Okay, you'd think i would learn from Andy's wonderful experiences at IKEA, but hey- i'm a dumbass.

So sunday i get up nice and early, call IKEA to see if they have the bit i need (i'm not that much of a dumbass), and upon receiving comfirmation - i'm off!

I get there, and of course they're out of stock. I just wanted a nice leather ottoman thing to be an ottoman/coffee table for my living room.

no joy.

so i made that 45 min drive each way, fought my way through birkenstock wearing lesbian couples, gnarly old men and their wives griping about prices as they (presumably) were shopping for their college freshmen daughters, and a small army of smelly foreign people who were looking get some good american/swedish deals to take back home(?) with them.

ikea blows monkeys.

Your secret is safe with us - promise!

2005-07-13T14:54:00.000-05:00

this is a repost from the fine folks over at Attrition

If you get a phone call from your credit card company, do you give them your social security number? Your mother's maiden name? The soul of your first-born child? Do you think that the company that holds your personal information cares more about you than their own bottom line? Of course you don't. And of course they don't.

In a one month period, an estimated 40 million credit card numbers could have possibly been compromised. What do the companies in charge of your personal information have to say about it? Better yet... what is the media reporting? You won't get the same story on both sides, will you?

What is becoming a near weekly occurance, large companies are collecting your personal information (sometimes without your knowledge or consent), and subsequently letting it fall into the hands of the bad guys. This is your personal information; name, address, social security number, credit card number, and more sometimes. All of this information is invaluable to criminals who carry out identity theft crime every day.

Ten Most Recent

University of Southern California - [2005-07-09]
(270,000 people to be contacted regarding security breach) [update] [mirror]

Michigan State University - [2005-07-07]
(27,000 accounts possibly compromised) [mirror]

Iron Mountain - [2005-07-06]
(physical loss of backup tapes - 600,000 exposed) [update] [mirror] [mirror 2]

DSW Shoes - [2005-06-30]
(Unspecified customer information, FTC Chief is victim - 1.4 million card numbers exposed) [mirror]

Medica Health Plans - [2005-06-29]
(System administrators may have had access to 1.2 million member records) [mirror]

CVS Corp. - [2005-06-21]
(Information on millions of transactions possibly revealed) [mirror]

CardSystems (MasterCard, Visa, American Express) - [2005-06-19]
(13.9 million compromised, but "only" 68,000 at high risk?) [update] [mirror] [mirror 2]

Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation (FDIC) - [2005-06-17]
(personal data of nearly 6,000 current and former employees stolen) [mirror]

Equifax Canada Inc. - [2005-06-17]
(605 consumer files breached - second breach in the last year) [mirror]

Motorola - [2005-06-13]
(Theft of computers containing names and Social Security numbers) [mirror]

********

And you people call me paranoid.

Vive la France (or not)

2005-07-12T10:12:00.000-05:00

I have found the really and truly stupidest lawsuit of all time. Actually, someone from Groklaw found it and and i'm blatantly doing some cut 'n pasting.

According to the Sydney Morning Herald [sub req'd], a transit company is suing a group of ten cleaning women in France, because they are car pooling instead of continuing to use their service. The Guardian has the story too. The number comes from this French account. The transit company lawyers call that "unfair and parasitical competition." They are asking for damages, including fines and -- believe it or not -- confiscation of the women's cars.

I love this quote from the Guardian:

"Using our cars is quicker and at least twice as cheap. And on the bus we didn't have the right to eat or even to speak," said Martine Bourguignon.

Wow, you dont' have the right to speak? No wonder the women are carpooling. ;)

Wtf is going on with our society? Monopolies are using to courts to maintain their monopolies... Kinda like Microsoft using SCO to go after the GPL....

Real Life Tron...

2005-07-12T09:23:00.000-05:00

I've seen a lot of weird game/reality crossovers ( i.e. real life monopoly in London), but this one is the coolest.

Remember the movie Tron? the first big CG movie?

Turns out some geeks managed to re-create the light-cycles game from Tron, but for real life.

That's really cool.

With some minor mods, one could do it with motorcycles....

Hmmmm

Arcola's Angels

2005-07-07T16:49:00.000-05:00

So yesterday a couple of us from my station, along with a whole slew of 1st responders from DC and Maryland got together in downtown DC for a photoshoot.

We were part of what will be a poster campaign for the Emergency Preparedness Initiative

The Emergency Preparedness Initiative will be launching a national awareness campaign in September as part of National Preparedness Month. Part of this campaign will include a poster that will include first responders and people with disabilities photographed together, as "partners".
There will be approx 100,000 posters sent across the country. Pretty cool!

The photographer was a guy called Earl Dotter who is apparently a rather famous photographer. I’ll post some pics when I get copies from the shoot. It was pretty damned fun then.

Special thanks to Jessica and Kymber who came with me – we needed more 1st responder chicks in uniforms.

Gang 9

2005-07-07T08:20:00.000-05:00

it seems that a bunch of us from my firestation have bikes. So our chief thought that we should pose for a picture. So we did. Unfortunately not everyone showed us with their bikes. But this is what we have - oh - click on the pic for a bigger copy.

and yes, i know there are more people than bikes, but the other guys we kind enough to help us clean the engine and such, and we're all on the same team etc etc - we took the pic together.

Notional Identity

2005-07-05T08:16:00.000-05:00

The 4th of July just passed – a big celebration of freedom and independence. As a dual citizen of Canada and the UK, living in the US during their Independence Day is always interesting. But hey, I live here, I love it, and as they say in those tacky Louis Lamour westerns, “I ride for the brand."

From what i remember about history, the American Revolution was about freedom. So I got to thinking – what is freedom to an American?

Well in the US – there are 3 basic documents that hold the tenets of freedom:

United States Constitution
Declaration of Independence
Bill of Rights

There is a deeper question here though – Freedom to do what? Or Freedom from whom?

I personally believe that a person should be free to do as they desire, so long as their actions don't impede the freedoms of another. In other words – what I do in my own home is my business. Most Americans would agree with this philosophy I think (despite the legislation on drugs and such – but that's a topic for another time).

So if what I do in my home is my own business, this begs the question then Freedom from Whom?

The obvious answer is freedom from government intervention. The American Revolution was also based on the Great Awakening and ironically the Enlightenment. In many ways, these were mutually exclusive belief systems, but then this is the idea of freedom right?

Either way, the concept was one of freedom from Tyranny.

So what's Tyranny?

In the original Greek meaning "tyrant" carried no ethical censure, a tyrant was anyone who overturned the established government of a city-state, usually through the use of popular support, to establish himself as dictator, or the heir of such a person.

But today it seems to mean:

The term now carries connotations of a cruel despot who places their own interests or the interests of a small oligarchy over the best interests of the general population of the state over which they govern.
Upon reading that definition – it got me to thinking about some of the issues that are going on right now that deal with freedom.

For example, back in the UK, there's a lot of debate going on about the UK's National Identity Card programme. (More information is available here, and opposition information here)

Aside from the huge cost (according to the LSE it will cost approx $500USD per ID card – and each person pays for their card.

Why is a National ID Card a good idea?

ID Cards don't prevent terrorism
ID Cards don't prevent Identity Theft
ID Cards aren't cheap
ID Cards can be forged
ID Cards make us less secure

Here is some some funny flash animation that also helps explain the issues.

What does this have to do with those us of living the US? Tons actually.

A US National ID card was recently slipped into a “must pass" appropriations bill. This means that soon a US National ID card is coming to you.

So looking at the big picture...

National ID Cards
warrant-free 'sneak and peek' law enforcement investigations
road surveillance cameras being installed everywhere
clandestine biometric surveillance
Patriot Act II – who needs judicial overview anyway?
Echelon
Carnivore
RFID Tags in passports
No Fly Lists
RFID Tags in consumer goods

Hmm... There's a pattern here, but I can't seem to find it.

Bottle Caps as WMD

2005-06-27T11:18:00.000-05:00

So Friday I was at RFK Stations watching the Nationals beat the Blue Jays. (bastards)

While at the game, I of course ordered the traditional hotdogs ($4 each) and some water bottles ($3 each).

They handed me the dogs and the water bottles, but only after taking off their caps.

"Can I have the caps please, I don't want to spill the water as my hands are full."

"Sorry sir, we have to take them for security reasons.

WTF!?

The threat from bottle caps is real my friends. At the Republican convention in NYC last year, they also banned water bottles at the Republican convention last September.

So next time you see someone in a public place drinking water, and smugly putting the cap back on the bottle - be even more alert because you never know - they might be a terrorist.

Speed anyone?

2005-06-22T10:43:00.000-05:00

and I'm not talking about the kind on my bike...

Seems on monday at the firehouse we had a special agent from the Drug Enforcement Agency Clandestine Lab team come and give us a presentation.

It was pretty sweet. Seems that meth labs are more and more commend, and a few hundred first responders are killed everyyear because of them. This is why they came to teach us what the indicators are and who to call when we find one.

I also learned a couple neat things....
1)apparently the term for meth heads are "Tweekers"
2) how to do a one pot cook of speed in a 2 litre bottle in only an hour.

Neat stuff...

Exam Update

2005-06-20T15:04:00.000-05:00

Last week I mentioned that I had an exam that i didn't want to take. Well i got the results back the other day.

Apparently i got the 2nd highest mark in the class.

wtf!

must have been a dumb class. Glad i won't be fighting fires side-by-side w/ those people.

Another great American Icon fades...

2005-06-20T14:57:00.000-05:00

Looks like the company that makes Hostess Twinkies is going bankrupt.

What a sad ending to an American Icon that began in the 1930s will soon fade away.

And no, stocking up on them won't work. Apparently they really don't last forever.

Bummer. I remember when a Pepsi and a pack of Twinkies was the breakfast of champions.

98% done

2005-06-20T09:44:00.000-05:00

Moving sucks.

Almost done.

Special thanks to Lara and Mark for your help this weekend. You guys rock.

Today after work - I'll grab the last couple things...

then the art of unpacking-fu will be needed.

bleh.

Moving sucks.

Ouch! Medic!

2005-06-16T09:24:00.000-05:00

So last night I was asked to go to the Loudoun County Fire Academy” to help out the EMT B class with their County EMT exam by being a 'trauma patient.' It was pretty fun.

They gave me some old clothes (to be cut up) and gave me a mock 'flailed chest' injury. Most of the teams that 'treated' me were pretty decent. One team from 6 were very good.

The sucky part of course is that the pressure bandage used to treat the 'wound' is taped to my bare chest.

My bare, moderately furry chest.

Ouch.

So now I have a partial wax job courtesy Loudoun County.

Ouch indeed.

Exam Day!

2005-06-14T14:06:00.000-05:00

so tonight i have an exam.

At least i think i do.

it's for this class that my fire chief wanted me to go to. it's been fun - but with my having been ill (bronchitis a couple weeks back), new job (i actually have to do things at this one), and moving (my house is sold next monday), i missed a couple classes.

fortunately i already an very solid in the material (fire behaviour etc).

unfortunately, i don't know if i can actually take the exam because i might not have the hours.

the saturday before last was 'a make up class' - i went and no one showed. i probably went to the wrong station.

this class has gone horribly awry, but hopefully i'll be able to sit the exam and even more hopefull i'll know enough to pass it.

bleh.

My hovercraft is full of eels

2005-06-09T22:04:00.000-05:00

حَوّامتي مُمْتِلئة بِأَنْقَلَيْسون

Tacky, but funny

2005-06-09T14:40:00.000-05:00

I just read this post from Andy's Blog. I agree, it's pretty damned funny.

Farewell "Old Man"

2005-05-26T11:04:00.000-05:00

it is with much sadness that I was notified that one of my fellow firefighters from my station passed away at 0345 this morning at Arlington Hospital. Perry "Old Man" Clark succumbed to an unknown brain tumor. He had been suffering from migraines lately and still helped out at our open house last weekend before going home to rest.

Farewell Old Man, may the gods reward you for your years of selflessness in serving others with the fire service.

I'm in heaven.

2005-05-24T04:00:00.000-05:00

Can i just say that i already love my new job? the people are cool, and finally i'm with a project that has some of the same techno/religious beliefs that i do. I.e. one of the mandates is to use 'open source solutions such as linux' wherever feasible.

wow.

no more meetings where 'yes we agree that this linux. solution that you're proposing will in fact save us a few million dollars, is much easier to manage remotely and yes the NSA believe that it far more secure, but we're going to go with WinXP because of look and feel. The irony is that the smegheads i worked for have "information and technology for better decision making" on their homepage.

Since when Department of Defense care more about look and feel than National Security? Too funny. This was why i left and went to the treasury project from hell. The only good thing about the treas gig was the commute. MUCH shorter than going towards the pentagon.

Yeah, it's a year later and i'm still bitter about that. wankers.

Point is, i think i might finally be happy with my new job.

(and yes, it really is 5am - i couldn't sleep - sick as a dog with a cold/flu thing)

/rant

Come join the Dark Side

2005-05-22T21:45:00.000-05:00

So I'm going back to the Dark Side. Treasury sucked big time. I really really really didn't like my job there. I didn't do anything.

Ya know Bob, I'd say that in a giv en week I only do about 15 minutes of real work.

Happily this is about to change. Tomorrow morning I report to a facility near Fair Lakes where I begin what at all accounts appears to be a dream job. I can't wait. Rumour has it I might actually get an office!

I'll update tomorrow (maybe)....

For Sale By Owner

2005-05-22T21:16:00.000-05:00

Well i'm finally getting around to updating this. I put my townhome for sale. I'm leaving the overly un-stimulating South Riding for an equally exciting suburban hell called Stoneridge here fun Loudoun County.

Good news is that I'm asking $75k more than I paid last year.

I'm selling it myself because the realtors would eat $27k of my profits (leeches!) It's cheaper for me to pay the mortgage for a year than to use one of those blood suckers.

So the new place is a nice 2 bedroom condo. 2 levels, and a 1 car garage (nice place to park the bike). It's a model unit so it has a nice kitchen, hardwood floors, fireplace, etc etc. It's loaded. I really need to paint though - the model designer had a neat idea in what they were trying to do with colours, but they... well they missed. So time to paint before I move in (hopefully next weekend)...

Other good news is that despite the loss of the tax benefits of home ownership, I'm still saving like 40% on my montly expenses.

Other other good news is it's closer to my firestation.

Bad news is it's slightly further commute to my new job (more on that soon)...

Perchance to dream...

2005-05-06T08:32:00.000-05:00

Okay, I found the bike of my dreams. While she isn't as fast as the R1, 1000rr or the ducs, she just looks hot and menacing. I want one.

Shame they're like $43k. Oh well, I'll just ride one in my dreams, kinda like i do with Ziyi Zhang

Protective Hearing Equipment Required

2005-05-05T20:58:00.000-05:00

So last week I went for some Pho with Smith. We were both on our bikes - him on his new R1, and my on my lil 'ol blackbird. We fired up our rides, his roared into life, and then smoothed down into a meanacing soft grumble, whereas mine just whimpered softly.

Well not anymore.

I managed to find some D&D slip-ons for my bike. OMG.

L O U D

I went for a small spin down the road, and wow - my bike sounds super loud. I like the sound though. While i don't think i'll ever ride without earplugs or my ipod with my awesome headphones for fear that i'll damage my hearing. Seriously.

But hey - they're still fun.

Anyway, but to the pre-open house cleaning obsession....

I'm too sexy for my hose

2005-05-03T15:41:00.000-05:00

A recent survey showed that being a firefighter is the sexiest job in the U.S. While I can understand the romantic view, it's not all that sexy.

Consider the hoses pictured above. Now imagine rolling them up after a big fire, loading them onto the fire engine, and taking them back to the station. Then you get to unroll them, pressure wash them (BOTH sides) and then pressure test them and put them back on the apparatus. (And yes, I did this last night)

Nothing sexy about that.

However, Some things are fun. Last night (in between hose washings), we did an extrication drill. We had a donated car that we got to cut up.

So we had the car on it's side with an imaginary victim inside it. Then the fun began...

And Voila - insta-Audi convertible. All in all it took about 15 minutes to stabilize the vehicle, and 5 mins to cut through the windshield, and cut the roof off. It was pretty fun.

The other neat thing is we had a couple people drop by because they were interested in joining, talk about giving the wrong impression. They might actually think we do cool things all the time.

brief update...

2005-04-26T20:55:00.000-05:00

a couple of quick things....

got a new fairing piece for my bike. it's installed and the bike almost looks new. just need new bolts and i'm a happy camper. Pics to come.

also decided to put my townhome on the market. Even with capital gains tax i should come out well ahead. looks like i will get that CBR1000RR or a Ducati 999s after all....

did some gardening for the first time. planted some yellow, purple and orange things. the purple things are growing, an orange thing bloomed and well the yellow ones... who knows. I have some pics, i'll post those when i'm not so lazy.

a sad day for canadians

2005-04-08T14:40:00.000-05:00

Canada's 'Sad' Beer Calamity

Thursday, April 07, 2005

A beer truck flipped over on a roadway overpass in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Monday, prompting local officials to comment on the tragedy.

"It is sad," Capt. Scott Logan of the Halifax Regional Fire Service told Halifax's Daily News. "Chances are they won't recover any of the beer."

The truck, hauling 46,368 bottles of Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, skidded to a stop against the overpass's guardrail, luckily avoiding a 50-foot plunge down to another road.

The female driver was pulled out of the cab uninjured — "more frazzled than hurt," according to Logan — letting rescuers focus on the calamitous aspects of the disaster.

"I had a tear in my eye, actually, when I was watching it," said police Constable Mark Hobeck. "It was full of beer. We were hoping a Hostess truck full of pretzels would come by, but no such luck."

gotta love canadians.

DAMMIT!

2005-03-28T11:09:00.000-05:00

Track Event Registration

Summit Point Motorsports Park, Main Course

Monday, April 25, 2005


Choose an option.


	Level:	Introductory - Try out NESBA by riding in the first 2 sessions of the day at no cost to you.
	Price:	Free
	Availability:	This level is full. If you choose to register for this level, you will be placed on a waiting list. If space becomes available, NESBA will contact you in the order in which you were placed on the list.


	Level:	Beginner
	Price:	$160.00
	Availability:	This level is full. If you choose to register for this level, you will be placed on a waiting list. If space becomes available, NESBA will contact you in the order in which you were placed on the list.


	Level:	Intermediate

WARNING:

2005-03-27T15:26:00.000-05:00

A school in Australia has recently banned iPods because they cause children to be antisocial.

So what wrong with this? Us geeks like to have a place to hide from time to time - and the iPod allows us a social construct whereby we can escape from the real world, but still be a part of it.

There is the downside though... consider two people on the Metro... They sit down beside each other, their eyes meet, they smile. She shyly says, 'hi.' He is blissfully unware because he's wearing an iPod.

Okay - so she just wants her students to get laid. Fair enough. Maybe if they introduce bluetooth so ipod wearers can go toothing while they groove.

Snow more boarding this year....

2005-03-22T09:22:00.000-05:00

So this weekend, Andy, Dallas, and Chris (aka Cleon) and I went to celebrate Andy's Stag party. One year later.

Anyway, happily iIsurvived my novice attempts at riding my face down the mountain while strapped onto a snowboard. I think the only casualties over the weekend were livers.

More importantly, it was an awesome time. Andy talks about it in his blog and did a most excellent and humourous photo blog.

So someone else needs to get married so we can do this again... Dallas? you're closer than the rest of us...

oh yeah, i passed

2005-03-15T20:38:00.000-05:00

btw, i forgot to mention that last saturday i passed EVOC II and III.

Seems i'm now legally allowed to drive class 2 (ambulances and such) and 3 (fire engines) emergency vehicles in the state of virginia with lights and sirens and such.

class one is included - so i can drive cop cars too. not legally though, cause i'd have to steal one first.

This time for sure... maybe.

2005-03-15T10:17:00.000-05:00

While eating a good nutritious breakfast and checking email in my cube... I come across a long awaited email.

It would appear that Andy's Snowboard Bonanza Weekend is a go. This will be the 3rd attempt. The first one (April 2004?) was cancelled because it was 70 outside and raining. The last time we checked mudboarding isn't an official sport yet (though with bikinis it might work), so we rescheduled for sometime around the 1st weekend in December. It's always cold and snows in December right?

bollox.

3^rd time is a charm. Unfortunately the numbers dwindle with each attempt. I think that there will only be 4 or 5 of us now. I have to thank the other guys who prepaid as well for keeping my costs down.

So this weekend, 7 Springs will phear the wrath of bald boarders! iPods on standby!

this offer void where prohibited by shite weather

Ted...

2005-03-13T22:31:00.000-05:00

When I was young (around 9) I was arrested for shoplifting at a store called Simpson's. Shame on me! Turned out that my brief and unsuccessful run of kleptomania had a good benefit.

I was paired up with a Big Brother. This is one of those stories where the Big Brothers / Big Sisters organizations truly made a huge difference in a kid.

My Big Brother's name is Ted. Ted is a professional Stained Glass Artist. He rocks.

I've known Ted now for over 25 years. He was probably the single most influencial adult male in my life. Through Ted I learned to appreciate the innate beauty (or "glory") that is found in what sometimes appears to be the most obvious yet overlooked places in life.

One of the things I respected Ted for was his willingness to put his own adulthood aside, and run around in the woods playing 'guns' or 'swords' with toy guns and swords he helped me make that morning in his woodshop (we did have a pretty fine sword design made out of quarter round). From him I learned to make stained glass windows, 'cheese dreams', wine from grapes we picked at his brothers (nasty stuff, but hey - it was good cause we made it).

Ted would also discuss life, the universe and everything with me as though I were an adult. Subsequently my little mind started to ask questions and think about life in a more profound way.

One of my favourite memories was taking Ted up to the Computer Science Deparment at the University where my Mum worked. We would spend hours arguing about the meaning of life on an old PDP 11 and the ultimate Dr. Phil predecessor - Eliza.

I guess I'm writing this because I'm not sure Ted knows just how much of an impact he had in my life.

Ted, in a word, thanks.

I owe you more than you'll ever truly know, and I am so very thankful.

WI hunter wants open season on feral cats

2005-03-09T10:57:00.000-05:00

The original link for this story is here.

An enterprising hunter in Wisconsin, in his infinite wisdom, has come up with the bright idea to have the state legislature delcare cates an unprotected species which would allow them to be hunted down and shot by anyone with a small game license.

Firefighter and hunter Mark Smith says that free-roaming cats are an invasive species that attack wild birds.

As you can imagine, cat-lovers everywhere are horrified, to the point of putting together a website, DontShootTheCat.com.

"I would hate to think that tame, owned cats who happen to slip out would be at risk of being deemed a wild, unprotected species," said Sheri Carr, senior humane officer at the Dane County Humane Society. "It's a delicate (ecological) balance out there, but does that mean people should be able to shoot their neighbor's cat? Probably not."

Okay...

a) this law is ridiculous
b) the guy proposing is a firefighter? WTF?! I guess his real motive is based on his being too lazy to get the ladder trucks out to rescue the poor kitties, he'd rather just shoot them out of the trees instead.

RIP old friend

2005-03-09T09:36:00.000-05:00

so it's official. My centre channel on my primary recevier is DOA. My lovely little Harman Kardon AVR 7000 that I've had since 1999. It's lived a good life - almost 6 years of endless DVDs, PS2 and Xbox gaming...

Farewell dear friend.

Now - just what do i replace it with? I need something with at least 4 fibre inputs, 4 component inputs, i'm all for a nice 7.1 sound and a 'night-time' option.

even better if the universal remote is actually universal.

*sigh* yet something else that gets in the way of the hardwood flooring projects....

mmMMmmMMmm Bacon.....

2005-03-08T13:36:00.000-05:00

What guy doesn't love bacon? I know I do. I know my 688|< friends do. So much so that we even named our Defcon team bac0n. The other day, someone posted to pantsfactory (a site run by some bac0n guys) a link to here:

The link says it all.